B. Lorenzo Buckinchere
Aug 31, 2025
It is the end of the month and time once again for our monthly review series. Our muse for the month of August is none other than Charlie Sheen.
Charlie Sheen’s 60th birthday is coming up in a few days on September 3, so there is no time quite as fitting as the present to review the life of the best male role model in Hollywood when it comes to women and dating.
Charlie Sheen is an American film and television actor who was born Carlos Irwin Estevez on September 3, 1965 in New York City. Born into a family of actors, Sheen is the son of actor Martin Sheen, and the brother of Emilio Estevez.
Sheen is best known for playing the role of philandering bachelor Charlie Harper on the hit dating sitcom, “Two and a Half Men” (2003-2015).
Two and a Half Men was created by Chuck Lorre, and the lead protagonist on the show is loosely based on Sheen’s dating life in reality.
Men lasted for 12 seasons and 262 episodes, but was sadly canceled a few years after Charlie was fired from the show in 2011, during a time when he was at the pinnacle of his acting career, being the highest paid actor on television at the time.
Sheen was allegedly fired amid controversy surrounding wage disputes, but many speculate that his use of illicit substances was becoming an issue. Sheen has a reputation for living somewhat of a wild party life, but despite all of that, his name has never been called up in a #metoo scandal.
They got Weinstein, Cosby and most recently Diddy. Then before that they got Kobe Bryant in 2003. The feminist court system humiliated these men, dragged their good names through the mud and exposed all of the gory details of their trysts for all the world to see, and they did so without mercy. They’ve managed to humiliate all these men but they never got Charlie, and they likely never will. Do you know why?
Because he pays them to leave.
Not necessarily because he wants to, but because he has no other choice if he wants to be responsible with how he keeps multiple women as a public figure in the #metoo era. Because when you are a high profile individual like he is, it’s very easy to become someone’s target due to the high levels of public scrutiny involved.
Charlie may act like aloof sometimes, but he’s actually really smart. He knows the game, and he also knows that there is a certain amount of contractual protection that comes from engaging in transactional encounters. So say what you will about the guy, he could get mixed up in a million other scandals, but I guarantee you that #metoo is not one of them.
I am not encouraging you to do what he does, but the least you can do is take a page or two out of his book. Protect yourself from golddigging feminist vultures. Go get laid without the risk of a scandal. Hire a professional, then pay her to leave.
But obviously take the necessary health and family planning precautions with a professional as you would with any woman.
So here’s to the next sixty years of paying them to leave, because guys like Charlie tend to live forever. I shall drink to that, and so will he I bet. I give the role model success story of Charlie Sheen a whopping five out of five Tiger Blood cocktails, and I’ll see you on the next one.
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